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Showing posts from January, 2010

the emptiness of departure

i was trying to attribute his words to where i stand in his life. some strange force brought us together, i was taking it as a mission to save people. to show others the proper way forward. we did all we can for the ones close to us. but in my mind, there is always him to save. its the urgency of life. there is an idea, the will and resources but there are no doors to reach. no even vague signals. this is a recent thing, this feeling of emptiness. its coming early in my 4th decade of life.

as i see it, i didn't have to find him. but i did. and all of us tried something to make his pain lesser. and he said today, we think the same thing and we want to do the same to everyone else. he works beyond his pain for others. but his life now is measured. i dont think him leaving will be a peaceful departure. it will always appear in my mind as a failure even when there are thousands out there with the same ailment who have been saved and are living beyond their time. whats worst is imaginin…

--|| Dark Resolutions ||--

updated!


totally forgot, its supposed to be dark resolutions!

(1) fight club. i think its going to be the year I finally send invitation letters to my enemies and start a fight club...where I bash them up. you know who you are! im going to beat the crap out of you, then tie you down till you are nearly dead and then pour salt water on your wounds. then let you live for another year. then ill restart it all over.

(2) street racing. Im up to this, i just need to make sure I dont kill anyone. and i want to do this without using brakes.

(3) build a giant rocket shooting firework. ive had this in my list for ages, i think this time I can afford it. and tie the damn thing on top of Indrans' car and ride through town shooting rockets. middle east hell yea!

(4) monthly booze motivation holiday trips. its langkawi and a bunch of indian guys willing do put their livers on the line of fire. its the ultimate cocktail swingers in action. its the great gp drunkfest!!! the january theme is bombay sap…