Monday, October 3

Of Questions and Why's

After this many years on the road, on this journey you start to realize things. Those ambitions you had and those dreams that was suppose to come true by now. Have you ever heard this mysterious voices talking to you. I always hear this voice ' macha, its time, stop now. Youre making a big mistake, your headed the wrong way'... At this moment, either you stop and freak out or you undo the mistake and restart. But not me, oh not ever me. I see signs all the time, damn, I even see the big STOP sigh down the road, but Im oblivious to it. I keep on going...
So you’re 26 and you’re big and strong and brave. But the world just got 26 years older. And then you realize it’s too late. Ok, maybe not too too late, but just late. Then you see in the giant plasma screen in the sky, where you went wrong, what you should have done and should be doing. Then there's this great big flashbacks of your life. Hey! No way! I used to wear all the buttons on my shirt up to the top one till I'm 15! :- And then it dawns. You’re not the dude. You're not the cool dude. Macha, youre not going to make it like them. You're not going to be the astronaut. You're not going to sing 'It’s a wonderful world' on the surface of the moon let alone mars. You’re not going to work with NASA. Oh I see it now. I should've listened to them a long time ago... Then it dawns. I'm not going to be that great soccer player. I'm not going to rock the Kop. I'm not going to score that super great awesome goal in the Champion Leagues Finals. They're not going to hang my picture in Anfield. I should have realized that the day I renamed my room 'Anfield'. I'm just not cut for it. Remember the song, that song, oh yes that great song. Now you realize you’re not going to be the greatest Saxophone player in the world. Youre not going cut records and play sell out concerts. Damn, don’t you see, you never been to a concert before.
So the voice keep booming in the sky. The TV has surround sound. And now you see more. Oh god, I'm not going to win that Nobel prize. It’s just too late isn’t it. I'm just too lazy for that. I cant even do some decent programming. I'm stuck. Hey, I'm an Indian. Should'nt I be a master coder by now. Create the next web revolution, make big fat bucks and buy my own island... And more and more images. I'm not going to fall in love. I have to stop imagining. I'm not going to get that girl. (Girls! - follow the link and be amazed)
Maybe its time. Maybe I should listen to the voice. Maybe life isn't all tea and tuna sandwiches. Now I wonder whether it’s real tuna...
'...another day is gone, I'm still all alone, how could this be, you’re not here with me, you never say goodbye, someone tell me why, did you have to go, and leave my world so cold...'- (MJ, You Are Not Alone)
****** a picture diary ******

The Library at far end.

Library Entrance

A Lonely Life of Pi. You can only find this and DaVinci Code in the library during the exam season.

Journal Section. Where you can find me most of the time.

Fugue. Happens when the librarian wakes you up and you wander not knowing where you are...

Newspapers on some psychedelic chair.

More Journals. And there the Physics World I always read.

Checkout Counters . Blur.

Einstein Meets Eliot.

Static. Hey! can u c the guy at the end...

Rows and rows of emptiness.

Ulysses by James Joyce. Many times voted the best novel of the past century.

Stories of Greatness. This long shelf contains all the past nobel winners in literature.

Books n Ghosts. The come out at night when everyone's gone home.

I ate a pack of these orange milk candies. And yes thats the poem I was writing, and posted at the bottom of the post.

Timescapes. Did'nt know I can do this with my cell.

****** a poetic journey ******

Of Ages and Questions

An October evening creeping near,
upon a flight of stairs I tire,
endless formations of spaces clear,
welcoming me in uneasy desire.

Invisible wind(s) brushing past,
blind as it is to see but it must,
fervently I try to catch its tail,
hope to fly away in a mystery sail,

A greeting, some threading and blue ties,
with it rows of books and age old mites,
one too many faces and repeating threes,
three friends with three books on three floors.

Decades of books, journals and chairs,
left to perish along with some king,
minions and archers on high shelves,
and a bonfire made of Eliot’s and old Jung.

Beautiful faces and shiny eyes,
no not the devil or its bride,
just slaves tracing ageless lexis,
who among many might one day write.

Time and sunset subsequently alight,
pages and shelves feast delight,
astronomers and artist are searching right,
a few books, Sylvia and an endless night.



[+] I love political cartoons, head here for the best; [CagieCartoons]


visithra said...

ure bored arent u ;p

Prakash said...

Visithira has said what i came to say....
the library is always....

Saravana Kumar said...

Macha do you believe in fate, destiny, providence, karma ... do you think about that netime ... from you post I see that you are thinking about that ...

and for a change today I did MASAT on your page :D

Barath said...

"Maybe its time. Maybe I should listen to the voice"

What was the last thing ur voice said to u?!!

Maran said...

Wow! I hate libraries!

sophie said...

like that candy snap...
and got ur handwriting...


it rains around the world sleep welcomes the dream, and  enigmatic souls awaken along the eternal shores of destiny